Praise!
Praise can be tricky in parenting. As parents we want our children to succeed and accomplish great things but too much praise can hinder their mindset and make them not value the praise they receive. When we as parents praise the exceptional things they work hard at children tend to put more effort and place more value on the praise they receive. Joanna Pocock said, "Although most parents and educators agree that some praise, or, more precisely, “positive encouragement,” is critical to developing children’s self-esteem, the keys are to limit it, to keep it focused, and to be honest with it. If we applaud everything our children do simply because they have done it, then we are teaching them that mere existence is enough. This leads to entitlement and narcissism, not self-assurance and confidence." She basically said when we praise too much then it isn't special anymore and can actually have the opposite effect on children and cause them not to try because their parent's are going to praise them no matter what.
The kind of praise we give them is important as well. When we just use generalities and say "Good job," for everything it takes away the meaningfulness of the accomplishment. Being specific with praise helps our children to recognize what they did to be successful and helps them understand what they were being praised for. Also, pay attention to how you are praising a child depending on their age. Obviously younger children need more simplistic praise while teens need more specific detailed praise. We love our children and want them to be successful and praising them appropriately will help them do that.
Praise can be tricky in parenting. As parents we want our children to succeed and accomplish great things but too much praise can hinder their mindset and make them not value the praise they receive. When we as parents praise the exceptional things they work hard at children tend to put more effort and place more value on the praise they receive. Joanna Pocock said, "Although most parents and educators agree that some praise, or, more precisely, “positive encouragement,” is critical to developing children’s self-esteem, the keys are to limit it, to keep it focused, and to be honest with it. If we applaud everything our children do simply because they have done it, then we are teaching them that mere existence is enough. This leads to entitlement and narcissism, not self-assurance and confidence." She basically said when we praise too much then it isn't special anymore and can actually have the opposite effect on children and cause them not to try because their parent's are going to praise them no matter what.
The kind of praise we give them is important as well. When we just use generalities and say "Good job," for everything it takes away the meaningfulness of the accomplishment. Being specific with praise helps our children to recognize what they did to be successful and helps them understand what they were being praised for. Also, pay attention to how you are praising a child depending on their age. Obviously younger children need more simplistic praise while teens need more specific detailed praise. We love our children and want them to be successful and praising them appropriately will help them do that.
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